Answers in disguise

Yesterday was an interesting day for me and Cade. He came over in the early afternoon while I was cleaning my car, and we hung out for a little while. I asked him if he wanted to come with me to Stake Conference, and he said he would like to, but at the same time, he said "I want to give those other guys a chance though." And when he said that, I'm pretty sure my eyes turned into daggers. I managed to maintain my composure, but once he left, I was fuming. I went to finish cleaning my car, and I was planning how I was going to break up with him. With his constant pushing for me to date other guys, I felt as if he was pushing me away. And I was sick and tired of it. Cade had said he would call me and tell me if he could come, but I didn't believe he was actually going to call me. I figured he would flake out and tell me he got busy. However, he called me at about quarter after 5, telling me he would be there. I was pleasantly surprised. During Conference, there were a lot of things that stood out to me, particularly about making decisions, counseling together, and that God loves me. All of those things were things that related to me and Cade. I knew that I needed to sit down and talk with him about everything, but I was scared and would have rather not.
After Conference though, we went back and watched a movie at his apartment, which was really fun. I was exhausted though. When he drove me home though, we were able to have a good, long discussion about what's been going on. He ended up telling me that when he would talk about giving the "other guys a chance", it was more of him saying "are you sure you want me?" And when he said that, my anger melted away, and I was filled with empathy. I understood why he said it so much. I was able to tell him that I was sure about my decision, and that he didn't need to second-guess that. It was a really important conversation that we had, and I know it was no coincidence that it happened the way it did.
After I was inside, I was thinking about all of it, and I had a thought that perhaps Cade was experiencing so much shyness and doubt so that I could learn to talk and bring up things that are concerning to me. I've never been good at that, so maybe this is Heavenly Father's plan - to help me learn how to communicate better, because I firmly believe that once Cade is married, he'll have no trouble talking about important things. I believe that very firmly. So, who knows? Only time will tell. He did promise me though that he would make an executive decision soon, which means he may decide that he does want to be exclusive. So, we'll find out soon enough!