Will it never end?!?!

I'm seriously going to scream or cuss, or totally just bawl or SOMETHING. I can't take much more of this! uggh! Basically, it's come to my knowledge that "Larry"'s dad is still being a total ***. "Larry"'s family has had it reeeaally rough the past few months because for some stupid reason all their electrical appliances keep breaking! First it was the washer, now it's the fridge, so they need to get new/used ones. most likely used, but anyway, his mom and dad had another huge fight about everything and his dad played the victim card, of course. And then he told "Larry" today or something that he wants to 'redate' his mom in a couple months, maybe. Maybe? Re-DATE her? She's his flipping wife! Holy mother of all that is friggin holy on this earth, he was married to her for 20 damn years, he has the GALL to do THIS to her and his kids, and then says he's thinking about MAYBE re-DATING her??? WHAAAT!!?
I think if anyone ever found out I was saying this stuff i'd be in big trouble, but I really don't care. Not right now. Probably not later either.
plus, turns out there's a whole lot of the situation that i don't know because "Larry" hasn't told me everything. I know he wants to keep me out of it as much as possible because he doesn't want it hurting me but it's a little too late for that. I've been hurting, excruciatingly, for the past month and a half. As I told him today, might as well stab the knife in completely than take little dices at my stability. Idk...
I think i've finally accepted that I try to make myself think that I'm strong-willed and tough and whatever, but inside, I'm really ridiculously fragile and unstable and I hate it.
I'm getting so close to my break point that I don't even know what to do with myself. I've been keeping EVERYTHING just to myself, being either unable, or unwilling to discuss it with anyone and it's like, eating away at my soul or my body because I feel so sick all the time. I don't feel hungry but at the same time feel starved. Happy but depressed. Stable, but on the verge of tears. But as I told "Larry" tonight, I love him, and going through this sort of pain is better than not loving him.