What?
Who said I had to be ready for anything?
I'll tell you.
It's called "being-ready-to-finally-receive-closure-on-a-breakup-that-happened-3-weeks-ago."
I was on another one of my online accounts other than Facebook, a site that both "Larry" and I have accounts on, and I still haven't brought myself to delete him as my friend, although I kinda feel like I should, because its' getting soooo hard to get on my profile and see things he's posted and I know he's falling back into some of his old habits. Bad habits, like swearing, and I think he may even be starting to become one of the "typical" football players that normal people despise because they're hot-headed and players and just
MEH.
It really hurts to see anything from him or hear anything about what he's doing, especially now that I'm worried that he's slipping into those bad things again... but I did all I could.
That's been the hardest thing to come to grips with. I did what I could for him, but it was weighing down so hard on me I didn't even know who I was anymore. It kinda makes me think of that time I wrote on here about a fight he and I had where he told me "he was losing himself faster than ever before because of how much I was asking him to change."
I was asking him to change for the better.
To be more of a chivalrous gentleman.
To be more righteous.
That sort of thing. How I was changing was:
I was never right.
I needed to always talk to him or he'd go crazy.
I couldn't talk to him about things that were bothering me emotionally because he's always say it was impractical.
I missed out on a lot of time I could've spent with my friends because I was always texting him.
I didn't enroll in college because I was so worried about what would happen to him if I couldn't be right by his side all the time cuz he needed me so much.
So, overall, what came of the relationship is:
I have almost no friends
I'm not in school
I'm working my butt off so I CAN go to school
and I've become a social stick in the mud in the dating area.
that's what happened to me...
and he says I hurt him worse.
Who said I had to be ready for anything?
I'll tell you.
It's called "being-ready-to-finally-receive-closure-on-a-breakup-that-happened-3-weeks-ago."
I was on another one of my online accounts other than Facebook, a site that both "Larry" and I have accounts on, and I still haven't brought myself to delete him as my friend, although I kinda feel like I should, because its' getting soooo hard to get on my profile and see things he's posted and I know he's falling back into some of his old habits. Bad habits, like swearing, and I think he may even be starting to become one of the "typical" football players that normal people despise because they're hot-headed and players and just
MEH.
It really hurts to see anything from him or hear anything about what he's doing, especially now that I'm worried that he's slipping into those bad things again... but I did all I could.
That's been the hardest thing to come to grips with. I did what I could for him, but it was weighing down so hard on me I didn't even know who I was anymore. It kinda makes me think of that time I wrote on here about a fight he and I had where he told me "he was losing himself faster than ever before because of how much I was asking him to change."
I was asking him to change for the better.
To be more of a chivalrous gentleman.
To be more righteous.
That sort of thing. How I was changing was:
I was never right.
I needed to always talk to him or he'd go crazy.
I couldn't talk to him about things that were bothering me emotionally because he's always say it was impractical.
I missed out on a lot of time I could've spent with my friends because I was always texting him.
I didn't enroll in college because I was so worried about what would happen to him if I couldn't be right by his side all the time cuz he needed me so much.
So, overall, what came of the relationship is:
I have almost no friends
I'm not in school
I'm working my butt off so I CAN go to school
and I've become a social stick in the mud in the dating area.
that's what happened to me...
and he says I hurt him worse.
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